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Tassel-free mom serves hassle-free brownies

By Staff | Sep 25, 2009

Just about now, some households are receiving letters or emails which read as follows:

Dear Mom,

I am getting used to college, and believe it or not, I am actually getting to classmost days. I know you and Dad wanted to bring me down to college, and I certainly appreciate the thoughtful gesture. I just thought it would be better for me to make this move on my own. I know before long you both will be coming for a visit and I do look forward to that. In the meantime I thought I would bring you up to speed on my new world.

Let me start first with my dorm room. It is not a pit, and it is bigger than our hall closet at home. It is far from the Waldorf Executive Suites-no mahogany furniture here! Once I placed that wonderful portrait of you and Dad upon the shelf, the room did become much more cheery. Thanks for packing this surprise in my bags, and don’t worry, it is having a profound effect on me. Whenever I think of goofing off, I catch a glimpse of you keeping an eye on me!

Next, I know you have been anxious to hear about my roommate. He is not a jock, he is not a nerd, he is far from a slob, and he is not even close to being a space cadet. In fact, he is super! I guess I have my older brothers to thank for this! Remember that earthy roommate that Brandon had? Oh, and how can we forget that leech that Luke got stuck with! The third time is the charm and I know you and Dad will think Jerry is terrific! Besides he cruises around campus in a 1963 Rambler in mint condition. This car gets extremely good gas mileage, some nights we drive around for hours without having to fill up!

My social life is non-existent as I have not yet met that beautiful blonde pre-med female who prefers to date younger men. I have been assigned to a work study position in the science hall where many of the pre-med students hang out. Dad has told me for years; marry a woman much smarter than you and life will be a breeze. Wasn’t Dad working in the science hall when you were pushing to get through the physician’s assistant program?

I am still undecided about a major. With so many options, maybe I should try to focus. By the way, how did you and Dad come out on the inheritance from Aunt Wilma?

The food here at times can bite back and then at other times it is ok. I have been warned that the split pea soup can induce reverse peristalsis! Nothing beats your cooking Mom! I especially miss your tasty baking and would give anything for a few of your delicious brownies.

I had better get to class! I look forward to hearing from you! You can usually reach me at 6 a.m. as I am wide awake at this hour because Jerry and I are just coming in after all night of cheap cruising in his Rambler. Tell Dad I may have to settle on a redheaded pre-med student!

Love, Josh

Dear Josh,

Thanks for the email. It was great to hear from you. Sounds like you’re discovering all sorts of new things! I have also been discovering a few new things. You know how very hot your upstairs bedroom gets. Well, last week your Dad brought home an air conditioner for your room. In the midst of getting it installed I happened to knock over that little wooden box on top of your bookcase and all of your classmates senior wallets ended up on the floor! As a result of my usual inquisitive self, I began reading the backs of these wallets as I picked them up. My-what knowledge can be accumulated in such a small space! Such as: “Josh, you are the life of the party. I will never forget the night we snuck your parents car out of the garage!” or “What fun it was to enjoy your parents basement when they were in Las Vegas. Who can forget Scott coming out of the bathroom wearing your mother’s pink bathrobe!” Thankfully, your Father made me quit reading them!

I just made a pan of your favorite brownies, and I will get them to the post office this afternoon so that you and Jerry can enjoy them. By the way, do you know where Scott is going to college? Maybe I will send him my pink bathrobe!

Love, Mom

Repnow is a Rugby resident

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